The Rest

There are few things as purely pleasurable as a simple, restful sleep. 

I am not, generally, a peaceful sleeper.  I lay awake at night, sometimes for hours, thinking (brooding, really) about mistakes made, tasks left undone, unsolved problems.  I have tried countless remedies to relieve this anguish.  Meditation; clear your mind, Sally... but the thoughts creep back in.  Mind games; count backwards by 3"s from 5,00 and the preoccupation of your mind will allow you to fall back asleep.  Ummm. No.  It won't.  Herbs; passion flower... Nothing.  Lavender... Smells pretty; still nothing.  Valerian... Really?  Nothing...  Tea; chamomile... nice but nothing. 

But tonight I feel sure that a full, restful night awaits me.  Why? 

Blissful exhaustion.  Exhaustion from spending a packed 24 hours with a dear friend.  Dancing, laughing. sharing, talking, shopping, eating and yes, drinking.  A day full of sharing our worries and cares; sharing what frightens us and what excites us.  We are both now single although she is newer to her single-dom than I, it provides us even more common ground that we previously had.  And we already had a lot.

Sharing the weight of our worries and fears makes them easier to carry, that is for sure.  Today, my load is light and my heart is filled with contentment.  I am reassured that whatever mistakes I have made or will make in life, whatever oversights or errors I make at work, there are people who understand and recognize the anxiety.  That even if I spend the rest of my days as a single gal, I will not be alone.

And with that peace comes the rest.